Wednesday, March 17, 2010

An Open Letter To Our Fans: Send Us to SXSW

Hello, friends!

If you're reading this I'm assuming you're a fan of the blog.  Good decision.  I guess it is also entirely conceivable you did a Google search for "electric mustache" trimmers and wound up here.  Happens all the time.  But, in the interest of this post that I'm writing I'm just going to assume you're a fan.  Okay?  Good.  So, you're a fan of the blog; you love our photos of local shows, our witty, informative and sometimes humorous commentary on all the latest mp3s and music videos from your favorite bands, and our coverage of the Phoenix music scene.

I'm here to say thanks for being a fan.  We do it all for you, the fan....and for the occasional free shit we sometimes get (not very often).  I'm also here to tell you we could be doing a lot more with your help.

As I'm sure you are probably aware right now in Austin, TX there is a little festival going on called South by Southwest (SXSW).  And as I'm sure you are also aware, this is a pretty big deal.  Over 2,000 bands from all over the world are going to make their way down to Austin for the annual music festival.  This is a music blogger's wet dream come true.  And Shawn and I are not going to be able to attend, again.

Now, I'm not writing this so that you guys will feel sorry for us.  I am writing this, however, to say that you can do us a solid and send us to SXSW.

I know this request sounds a little unreasonable.  You're probably saying to yourself right now, "fuck these guys, what do I care if they go to some music festival in TX?"  And to you I say that we're not doing it for us but that we're doing it for you.

Think about all the sweet ass photos that Shawn could take of bands like The Morning Benders, Sharon Van Etten, Broken Bells or the countless other cool bands that will be playing SXSW this year.  That's eye candy for you to enjoy.  So, I ask, who is really getting the better of the deal?

Now, obviously it's a little bit late in the game to be going down to SXSW this year.  Preparations need to be made and we just couldn't swing a trip to Austin this year even if we wanted to.  So we're thinking ahead to SXSW 2011.

Here is what we need:  money.

Shawn and I face a couple of hurdles that prevent us from attending SXSW each year and all of those hurdles could be taken care of with money.  So, we're thinking a minimum donation of $500 would just about cover it.  That will cover things like gas, food, badges to get into the shows, hotel accommodations, luxury car rentals, personal assistants, etc.  Pretty much the bare essentials. 

I know that $500 is a lot of money and we're going through a recession and blah blah blah.  But c'mon, we're giving you guys a whole year to come up with the money.  It's not like we need it tomorrow.  Besides, you'll thank us later when you're talking to your buddy and you say something like, "did you see those photos of Arcade Fire that Electric Mustache took at SXSW this year?" and then he'll say, "yeah."  You'll then probably switch topics to something far more interesting and relevant.  But at least he'll know what you're talking about and it will be the perfect springboard for far more interesting conversations you're sure to have.

Look, we're just asking you to look into your hearts and think about all the mp3s and music videos we've shared with you guys and how we've brightened your days with our tireless efforts to bring you the coolest new music and ask that you help us help you even more by sending us to SXSW.



PS:  In no way am I seriously asking you to send us money.  Unless you really want to.  In which case we'd be really grateful.  But only if you really, really, really wanted to.  

PPS:  I know it seems entirely obvious that I was joking and I didn't really need to put a disclaimer at the end there but I'd hate to have people really think I was serious.  Like the time I said we were opening a music venue.  People really thought we were serious about that.